Hey, everyone. Sorry for the lack of posts lately. I’ve been doing a lot of research on perfecting my NCAA bracket. And now that the games have started, I’ll be even less productive here. But I’ve also got a new hobby going, selling office supplies.
It’s a great way to supplement my income at this lousy job. The process has gotten a little more complicated, though. Before I would walk out with extra reams of paper, staplers and even some old computer monitors. But now I’m pretty sure HR is on to my hustle.
Now to throw everyone off, I’m simply mailing items to a client. Only Stu Pit is not a real client. The items go to Stu’s PO Box which I created. Then a few times a month, he gets a delivery. I swing by and pick it up and flip the items online. Craigslist is the best for quick, no names needed, cash only transactions.
I know my new hobby is probably less than ethical. And it’s likely hurting the bottom line here. But I didn’t get my usual Christmas bonus this past year and they’ve cut back on the other office perks. What’s a guy with a gambling habit and a Candy Crush addiction to do? I curse those in-app purchases.
Tom Laundry is quite possibly the world’s worst employee. He likes to drunk snap from his cubicle and HR is constantly ruining his mojo, telling him to put his pants back on. He believes that smoking a little weed on his lunch break makes him a better co-worker and can often be found hiding out in the men’s room with his flask of vodka, eating a bag of cheetos, catching up on Jimmy Fallon tweets. Follow him on twitter at @TommLaundry where he tweets #BadEmployee tweets with one hand.